Monday 29 September 2014

Boredom Busters!


Is there such a thing as a candle-sniffing addiction? I mean, I get the whole glue sniffing thing, well, I don't entirely get it, but I know it's a thing... Phew, what did I just get myself into there? Anyway, I'm currently sitting in what can only be described as my office. <- Ha, hark at me. It's basically the dining room of our apartment that we've turned into a sort of office area because it was pretty much redundant space. We have a rather large living room in which our dining table sits comfortably, so we thought we'd act like those posh folk and go and create ourselves a little study. Oo-er. 

Ah yes, the candle. I have been sat here, nose deep in SINNLIG 40h, also described as a strawberry IKEA candle, for the last ten minutes and I'm pretty sure I can hear my brain cells dissolving as I do. I'd go as far as to say I've got a headache and the lining of my nostrils feel like they've been rushing to go out and had a dry shave. I guess I should put it down but it smells so damn good. Is anyone else a real sucker for a scented candle, and by sucker I mean sits there like a junkie inhaling every last precious whiff? 

I need to get a life. 

Here's a list of things you can do, instead of candle-sniffing, to prevent yourself from sliding down this slippery slope:

- Carve sculptures out of cheese - Goes away to Google if cheese sculptures are a thing.

- Create an artistic masterpiece using numbers and punctuation on your phone. My proudest moment, pre university, was creating a bear holding a flower on my Nokia 3210. Skills.

- Order a heap of stuff online and then sit in a corner, silently sobbing whilst cutting up your credit cards.

- Invent time travel because I did a whole bunch of shit whilst drunk that I'd like to go back and ctrl-alt-delete. 

- Wow someone with this egg in a bottle trick. Most bottles with a narrow neck will do. 



- Teach yourself to beat box and then apply for Britain's Got Talent, or a similar talent contest. 

- Try to fold a piece of paper more than seven times - apparently it's pretty much impossible. (Unless you use a piece of tissue paper the size of football pitch or something) Go on, try it!

- Choreograph a routine to Taylor Swift's Shake it off and perform it in front of your bedroom mirror, and the unsuspecting window cleaner and/or nosy neighbours. 

- Re-write the Fresh Prince of Bel Air rap for your unsuspecting partner/friend and marvel at your own lyrical genius... (It's a winner - speaking from experience!)

There you go guys, you now no longer have any excuse to develop a sniffing habit or any other disturbing byproduct of boredom. I'll accept written thanks in the form of a comment below. 

I'm also going to wave my hands at you all and take this moment to put the feelers out for anyone who may be interested in guest posting over here whilst I'm away on my jollies. I'll be gone from late October to mid November so if you're interested, feel free to contact me via effortlesslyexcessive@hotmail.com, I don't bite... promise! Many hugs and thanks in advance. 

Happy Monday everyone!
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5 comments

  1. haha this post mademe laugh so much!! im not gonna lie- i do love sniffing a good scented candle haha! id love it if youd comment back http://www.amyelizabethfashion.com/2014/09/lfw-designer-show-marchesa-notte.html xx

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    1. I'm glad you enjoyed it Amy. Thanks for commenting xxx

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  3. I feel you man.

    Candle-sniffing. It's become a problem. Especially when purchasing them. They should really slap warning labels on them: "WARNING: THIS PRODUCT MAY LEAD TO UNHEALTHY SNIFFING HABIT"

    Thanks for writing another stupid-grin-evoking post. Love how your personality spills out between your words :)
    jaaananannn.blogspot.com

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    1. Haha, I'm all for the label idea! Candle shopping always results in headaches - always! Thanks for your lovely comment and I'm glad you enjoyed the post xxx

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